how do I feel when my little boy prays, please help mommy not to be mad. I mean if he doesn't listen then yes I am going to be mad, but I don't need to lose my temper. I need to work on showing him my love, even when I am mad.

Cleaning

I must admit I like cleaning. I mean I don't really like doing it but I don't mind either and then when I am done I love that feeling. It feels good so see what ever it is that you have cleaned, plus it makes me feel like I can relax. I also have noticed I really like to have things clean. I don't really care if yo don't clean your house, but I love having mine clean. I honestly don't mind when I go to other people's homes that are not clean, and they aways say sorry about the mess. Well, it doesn't bother me, I don't live there, I just came to visit. I can go home and relax on my couch and look at my clean hose, so no other people's messy houses don't bother me at all. In fact it just makes that person seem more human in my eyes. I have this thing, which I am realizing more people then I thought to do, where I always see the best in strangers, and the worst in myself and my family. It is a habit I need to get out of. It is good to see the best in others, but I should also look for the best in myself and my family. That is it for now. :-)

I am back!

It worked today, I turned the day around by getting off my butt and getting outside. It was a little cold, but I raked the leaves while my kids ate snow using big leaves as plates. Who knows next they may be eating sand out of a sandbox, at least I know they will survive that! ;-) But I did get a lot done and I am feeling better, it is amazing what a little hard work and a little fresh air will do for you. And I had a moment with my kids I will never forget, at least not for a while. Daniel loves to run around the circle by my house, so he was going to and Elena wanted to go with him. So I told him she could if he would show her what to do and stay with her. So he says, you go like this Elena and starts running but crazy like, I think he is pretending he is a rocket or car. Anyway she starts to run like him, adorable, but then she turns around after a bit and waves at me with the biggest smile ever. Then every so often Daniel stops to wait for her and when she catches up to him she turns and waves. It was so cute, I think she was excited to have that much freedom, she seemed proud of herself for doing it.

one of those days.....

Today I am having one of those days. It isn't a bad day, but nothing is quite working out how I planned, or at all. It is okay though, I had a nice big juicy burger with a coke, and now things are looking better. i would have gone for some chocolate, but I feel something coming on so I will hold off on that. I need to get up and moving, to get going, and off the computer. I am finding I am really good at planning and also really good at doing, but not so good at both at the same time. I suppose I am back to where I was before, I need to cut out the un/less important things in my life. The first thing is going to have to be less computer time and less T.V, not that I watch a ton, but sometimes I do in the evening after the kids have gone to bed, I am home alone and I turn it on and before I know it 2 hours have gone by. Now relaxing is good, but only a little at a time. So here I go off to make it happen.

2012

Okay so Christopher and I went and saw 2012, the movie.  it was good, a little long, and some parts were a bit cheesy, but overall it was good.  Now the question is is the world really going to end on 12-21-12, I really don't think so.  Well, I know it isn't, but what I can't see is how people believe it is going to.  Also I can't understand why people would kill themselves if they thought the world was going to end.  Okay so say I do think it will end in 2012, wouldn't I want to do everything I can now, have fun, enjoy my life, and then, maybe once it starts happening, then go jump off a building, or whatever.  I don't see the logic in doing it now.  What if you are wrong.  This one guy, a professor or something, says he has enough money to live until dec 12, 2012 so he quit his job and is going to spend the time traveling to see the world and try to find the safest place to be.  If the whole world is ending, then how can there be a safest place.  Who knows, I just thought I you give you all my two cents, do with it what you want.  :-)

Feel your feelings

I really don't like that I feel my feeling very fast. Here is what I mean, I can go from feeling so happy everything is great, to feeling alone, in just a few minutes. The only good thing about feeling my feelings fast is that I am also ready to forgive fast. If I get upset I can calm myself down and be ready to talk about it and forgive the other person in a few minutes. The bummer about this is my husband is slow, well, HE isn't slow :-), he just likes to take time to think things over in his head, a lot of time. Which is fine, we have just worked it out. The thing that bothers me about how fast I feel my feelings is that I can be feeling so great, so happy, then before I know it, BAM, I am not anymore. I think thinking too much is my problem. I stinking brain always is working. Hence the reason I can't fall asleep. And that is when it happens, I will be laying in bed feeling great, then I start to think, and my mood changes, I am thinking about all I have to do and all of the sudden I am feeling stressed, really stressed, so much so that I want to get up and start doing things. Then I convince myself I am a dork, and instead of being so stressed about all I have to do, I should be grateful for all I have. And the thinking starts again, and before you know it I am brought to tears by the joy I feel. It is insane, but then again so am . :-) Those are the thoughts for today.

Other people's kids....

I am amazed at how much I can love other people's kids. I love my own, but that comes with the title mom, but somehow with some kids, most kids I just have a natural love for them. I know it isn't a bad thing, but I just can't understand it. And sometimes I just feel very close to some kids, closer then others I know just as well. I don't know I just love kids. That being said, I am not sure how many I am going to have, but I know I wouldn't mind working with other people kids after I am done having my own. I guess that is why I was called to the Primary, uh, who would have known? :-)