Who you are is made up of tons of small choices...... (Gotta find a better phrase that says that)
But here is what I mean.... If a person used to be fit but now they are out of shape they probably go that way by eating more exercising less, you know... but really it was just one choice at a time, small choices, like to have something greasy instead of veggies..... or to watch a show instead of take a walk. Well likewise if someone used to be generous and now they are stingy, they got there the same way, only reason it looks different is because the choices they made were probably subconscious. Like they used to give a lot to everyone then they met someone who used them for their stuff and they became a bit jaded. So slowly over time they choose, weather they know it or not, to be stingy. Just like the person in example one choose to be out of shape. (Not saying anything about anyone but myself, don't take this offensive)
So that must mean that we choose to be the way we are. If we don't like something about our character then we need to choose to change it. So I have been thinking about this because I am not as confident as I want to be but didn't know how to gain that confidence. Well here it is.. just hit me in the head. I have to make a series of choices. I have to choose to be confident. It isn't easy but it is do-able. It will take time, just as much time as it took me to lose my confidence and get to where I am now...... second guessing every choice, unable to make a decision, wondering what others are thinking about me (more like obsessing about it, to the point where I change the way I act because of it) This is NOT me, and today right now I am making a choice to get on the long path back to myself. I choose to change myself for the better and to be confident.
Long ago I deliberately began to develop a personal philosophy. I did not just accept things I had grown up with, or that were considered a given by society or any part of it... I considered everything... thought it back and down to rock bottom to the best of my ability and then kept or disposed of the concept.
ReplyDeleteThe very first plank of my personal platform was "Do not relinquish your personal power." After a little bit, I realized that had to be modified... for in a relationship with others, whether it be personal or because you need a job... there will be an exchange of some sort.; there must me such. So it got changed to "Do not, unthinking, relinquish your personal power." With thought comes conscious choice and a balance. What y you give up is balanced by what you get.
And that was only the beginning. If you know what you stand on, and what you stand for... when you have consciously chosen your path... it is much easier to walk it day by day. There will be no second guessing, for even instantaneous decisions are made from a point of strength.
And that is another one... "Do not make a decision from a point of weakness." Very, very little will not allow time for consideration, for one to sleep on it, so to speak.
You are on a good path, Halley.
I'm really proud of you Halley. This kind of thinking is what leads us to our adult selves. I call it living conscientiously, or living with purpose. Kind of like that article Katey just posted on FB about being awesome (maybe you didn't read it.) SO many people go through life just letting life happen to them. I find myself attracted to those who live with purpose. And I think that it is awesome that you shared this on your blog.
ReplyDeleteBoth good comments, it is easy to forget this and slip back into old habits so looks like I am going to have to get some vinyl on my wall in my bedroom, one will say... Live with purpose, I like that, and the other will say.... I choose me! Thanks for the supporting words, you are both amazing women, who, from my point of view, are very sure of who they are.
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